Moment of silence

Tomorrow I'm out of here kitties. My nails are painted and ready to go with a glaring shade of ruby red. Jag-U-Are. That is actually what it is called. It's the first time I can paint my nails for a long while, they wanted to come out and say hi. Since I'd be meeting people of a more upstanding calibre than usual it was probably best that the colour was something that was more within the accepted range of normality. I'll save the harlequin checks for after I get back.

Two weeks absence, give or...give two days. My level of readiness at what is now roughly 14 hours away from takeoff is tip off to how I feel about the whole skipping town situation. That is to say, not ready at all. At least it won't be the all nighter ordeal that was the 48 hours before my flight back to Australia back in December.

I am feeling somewhat optimistic though. Finally leaving would also mean that I'll finally be on the last legs of being in such close proximity to the giver of my lifeblood, the lioness to my cub, the cause of all this buzzing in my head that I spend all my life trying to get rid of. The last three weeks has not been easy. I was kept sane by occupying what little space between us with things. Filling up all the time with anything but silence, or the promotion of conversation. Movies, mostly. Movies I knew would offer the least amount of argument, mostly Oscar winners and nominees of the past year that I didn't deem to be required viewing at the time of release.

But this post is not about that. This post is about the sunnier, sparkier, sweatier future awaiting my return. It would be July, and it would be glorious. This Summer break has not been much of a break yet, for a lot of people, but July would eventually come and lift the straps off our heavy heavy hearts, expertly running its fingers over our back finding every knot and kneading it back into submission. I intend on not doing very much in July. It would be the long refreshing nap that gets you ready. The one that's full of promise. Reader, we're going to love July.

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Slop Bucket

As promised, summery days and nights arrived ahead of its cue, and like an embarrassed child, retracted apologetically. We did manage to slip in a few fun filled days in the park during its brief appearance, as most of you on facebook (read: everyone) already know. That was one way to while away the listless daylight hours now. I suppose I could (should) start the job hunt on the illegal overseas student employment market. If there are any readers out there who are owners of manhattan based establishments willing to take on a neurotic (in an entirely professional way) Asian (= hard working) girl who is constantly on the quest for approval (= fantastic customer service), please, save me the trouble and drop a line.

Apart from that, I think I'll just continue on my mission of watching every episode of shows on netflix I'd always wanted to watch but never had the time to.

That would only be until mother arrives, of course.

I need to make it clear though, here, for everyone to see. I, Alice Bing Qing Tao Qin, hereby swear that my work ethic is going to shape right up, as of, errr.....now. Remember my fuck it manifesto? Well it's now going to include this amendment.

On top of not being afraid of creating and treating it like first time sex (just get it done so you can get on to the much better second and third time sex, according to merlin mann) I will actually go further, do more than the bare requirement. Ask more of myself than what is asked by the other people around me. Not just getting the job done but banging it out of the park. I'm mixing metaphors here but you get the idea. Because let's face it, being "good enough" is too easy, and unsatisfying (shit, the sex puns just want to write themselves). There, it's in print now, and you can all hold me to it.

CALL ME OUT ON MY BULLSHIT, people. If I'm clearly not trying hard enough, slap me, hard.

The fat trimming would begin, coincidentally, with fat trimming. Before you guys start on me, yeah, I know I'm not fat. I'm clearly not thin either, and the truth is I probably never will be simply because of my body shape. But for someone who has always sat on the "underweight" side of the BMI scale, to be smack bang in the middle now makes me sad. Regular regimen, cutting out most of the junk (save for my How I Met Your Mother dates, because girl talk and sitcoms are not the same without chocolate), and throwing out my takeout menus. Earning points on Delivery.com is just not worth it. That's enough airing of laundry for the night.

**

I have had a fine start to my summer break, people. Enjoyed the company of great people, learned a lesson in managing expectations... there is one thing nagging the back of my head though.

I lost a friend recently. No, no one died, but through an offhand comment, I had manged to offend someone irrevocably. Obviously, a button got pushed that I shouldn't have played around with in the first place. I have went over my words repeatedly and have decided point blank, that I would not apologise for them, because the entire friendship was based on two people who can be brutally honest with each other, and an apology would simply be a lie. Knowing him to be who he is, I am sure he would not see my side of things either. Stale mate, a friend is lost. I haven't thought about this for days now, namely because I've had a blissful few days, and I'm a brilliant compartmentaliser. But today, waking up in an empty bed, feeling a little disoriented and then realising that the person I normally try to make sense of it all to, to jot down these related elements in my life in a cohesive way, I can no longer relate to. For that, on a day that I was already kinda bummed, the arrow ticked over into the blue zone.

Let's focus on the bliss for a moment here. I won't go too much into it, but good food, good friends, and other kinds of good times. The lesson here is to just go with it, that if it feels right, then don't let inconsequential things hinder you any. And High Fidelity is still an awesome film no matter how many times I've seen it.

The Girlfriend Experience is on showtime right now. You know, for someone who performs like a champ in front of a camera for adult activities, Sasha Grey is really an incredibly dull person. Speaking of which, could we pause for a moment to revel in the recently resurrected hotness of scarjo? She has reclaimed her heights at the Match Point levels of hot, meaning, had I not been in the company of people, I may have had a much bigger reaction to that last black widow fight sequence.

Alright, this post is now officially living up to its title, time to call it a night. It is now a Friday though, so you know what that means...

Five scenes from my life in 2010 so far.

* The night before leaving Melbourne, Dean, Maya and Yoyo in my drive way, making things impossible.

* After Jimmy's critiques of the Poetry Projects, the running outside followed by the 45 minutes of uncontrollable sobbing that occurred.

* Studio 2F, Voice and Speech class, the most awkward thing to have happened this year, you know what I'm talking about.

* Corner of 32nd and 5th Ave, outside Chicken Revolution, two girls screaming at each other about life changing things.

* Walking out of Hotel Chelsea with a certain red head


More Narcissism Than You Asked For

1. What time did you get up this morning?
Chris texted me before noon, I woke up, typed a reply, fell back asleep before hitting send... I'm going to go with noon.

2. Diamonds or pearls?
Diamonds, duh.

3. What was the last film you saw at the cinema?
Iron Man 2. It was good times

4. What's your favorite TV show?
Studio 60, Mad Men, and then a lot of trash I'd rather not admit to but you all know anyway

5. What did you have for breakfast this morning?
Nothing, refer to question 1.

6. What's your favorite cuisine?
The carb/starch portion of most cuisines. Breads, Rice, Potatos, Pasta, Noodles. I could KILL a garlic naan right now.

7. What foods do you dislike?
Coriander

8. What is your favorite chip flavor?
Red Deli chips Lime and Black Pepper (someone please send me some)

9. What's your favorite CD at the moment?
Today was a Portishead - Dummy kind of day.

10. What kind of car do you drive?
used to. Pug, I miss it, it's a sad story.

11. Favorite sandwich?
the closed smxl at Melbourne Central 5/6 years ago. Moroccan Lamb, served by Tony. (If you know who I'm talking about, please contact me)

12. What characteristics do you despise?
Arrogance, Ignorance,

13. What is your favorite type of clothing?
Comforting

14. If you could go anywhere in the world on vacation.Where?
Barcelona

15. What color is your bathroom?
Painfully white.

16. Favorite brand of clothing?
My own that I'm totally going to create that only makes one size in each style

17. Where would you retire to?
Melbourne. Really truly.

18. Favorite time of the day?
Dusk

19. What was your most memorable birthday?
My 21st. It was super low key, with very select people, and I actually remember it being happy.

20. Where were you born?
China

21. Favorite sport to watch?
Errrr.... Anything during the Olympics. Tennis during Aussie Open, Soccer during World Cup, but if there's some sitcom marathon on at the same time I'd totally pick the sitcom

22. Who do you least expect to send this back to you?
no one

23. Person you expect to send it back first?
I will be sending this to no one

24. What fabric detergent do you use?
Bounce dryer sheets

25. Were you named after anyone?
I was named after a Chinese proverb. Alice I just picked out of a dictionary.

26. Do you wish on stars?
no, I prefer to ask questions to the solitaire gods

27. When did you last cry?
When Bernard's voice quivered during my evals, I lost it.

28. Do you like your handwriting?
When I'm trying, it's ok, but not really.

29. If you were another person, would YOU be friends with you?
I like to think so.

30. Are you a daredevil?
haaaaaa. In that I do stupid shit, yes.

31. Do looks matter?
Yes. Absolutely. But how a person look to you changes as you learn more about them.

32. How do you release anger?
In imagined outbursts while I'm lying in my bed. Or in very passive aggressive ways.

34. What were your favorite toys as a child?
Books. I was a boring kid. Actually I just liked playing with other kids. Jump rope, stunt jump rope, hide and seek, stunt hide and seek, trying to kick shuttlecock.

35. What class in High School was totally useless?
Chinese, because we had a bullshit teacher who even my mother agrees I could have taught.

37 Favorite movies?
Check my facebook profile

38. What are your nicknames?
I did a Friday Five on this once...

39. Do you untie your shoes when you take them off?
Not often

40. Do you think that you are strong?
Resilient.

41. What's your favorite ice cream flavor?
Pistachio - because I'm an old lady.

42. What are your favorite colors?
Right now it appears to be green. Bright colours that make me happy

43. What is your least favorite thing about yourself?
I don't like it when I talk. I communicate better in noises.

44. Who do you miss the most?
ergh, where do I begin. My grandfather, Dean, Maya, Yoyo, Daphne, Cary, Ryan, my boys Miles and Charlie.

45. Do you want everyone you sent this to, to send it back to you?
......no

46 What color pants are you wearing?
I'm wearing a dress right now

47. Last thing you ate?
Fudge

48. Favorite song?
This is joke response because the question has to be a joke. Mao! Mao! by Claude Channes
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aQI50yhLXGM

49. If you were a CRAYON what color would you be?
Yellow. Right? RIGHT???

50. Last person you talked to on the phone?
Hannah, arranging our Crack Pie date tomorrow

51. What is the first thing you notice about the opposite sex?
Eyes, then if I'm interested, shoulders then lips.

52. Favorite drink?
Tea

53. Do you wear contacts?
Yes

54. Favorite day of the year?
First day of Spring, New Years Day.

55. Endings happy or sad?
Happy

56. Winter/summer?
errrrrrr.... Winter, because I look cuter.

57. Hugs OR Kisses?
Hugs

58. What is Your Favorite Dessert?
Something light. Fruit over dessert most of the time

59. What Book(s) are you reading?
ergh. I'm a pathetic book reader right now

60. What is on your mouse pad?
you mean what's on my trackpad? well worn finger marks

61. What Did You Watch Last night on TV?
Arrested Development

62. Favorite Smells?
Clean laundry coming out of the dryer, Pillows a cute boy slept on after he's left, Clean hair, Armani Sensi

63. Stones or Beatles?
Beatles. I do love me a bit of Stones too though

64. What's the furthest you've been from home?
Right here.

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pomp and lustre

It is still freezing. Which is why I'm still not blogging the way I'm supposed to. I still don't have a roommate, so my room is slowly degrading into a slum of nuclear proportions. I should have cleaned it up a little today it's my day off, but the rest of me wanted a day off too.

I got a friend request the other day on facebook, apparently he's a fan of my blog.



I'm sorry Jimmy that I couldn't add you. Because of the amount of information I give out on my facebook I do have a "people I've actually met" policy. Plus then you'll see all the classy(crass) photos and that would tarnish your glowing image of me.

--------------------------------

The following is a muddled jumble of fly-by self pity party, proceed with care:

--------------------------------

The numbness I'd been feeling in the last year or so is shedding away little by little. It's mostly uncomfortable, but nice to know that within these frozen limbs, emotions still dwell. The last six months especially has been an exercise in loneliness as a crowd experience. Slowly grasping at, and fingering, feeling my way through the parameters of my comfort zone. Rediscovering that I'm not just a set of digestive and sexual organs, that I can feel things as myself, and not some version that I'd like others to see.

Hopefully this signals a return to form. Over the years, even my prose has turned far more direct, sharp, bitter, and all that is left of the humour, biting. Meanwhile my head had become a bag of jelly, the mushy Aeroplane kind. If it is not aesthetics analysis, it refused to produce an opinion. A vessel of receptors waiting for that instant gratification, shameless contradictions of moral values, and self indulgence. Repetition, repetition, repetition, never letting the senses rest. Videos, sounds, music, movies, images, just don't let it stop, play several at once, I know everything backwards already but just don't let it stop, let my mind shut out any thought that needs to be dealt with, just don't let it stop. Relentless saturation of anything devoid of neurological nourishment. I reach out my hand for anything that is safe, old ideas, old conversations, old encouragements. It's an easy high, you ride it fast and it fizzles out, that's why you need the constant injection. Simulated emotions, play acting, anyone could do this, anyone could be me.

One mississippi, two mississippi, three mississippi... The constant frustration, over the past, the future, regrets, helplessness, my life, all collapsing on me in spasms tightening my entire body. My hands were clamped, my feet jerked the way they do when I come. I couldn't move or breathe, I could only laugh because suddenly I was not doing a Meisner exercise in class anymore, I was fucking my last two years of existence into the ground. Was I okay? Well I needed more than just a drink of fucking water that's for sure. I want a re-write.

But at least I author my own disaster

Back to the point I was making, I can feel flickerings of past excitements, before I became a shell of external gestures. It's an embarrassingly small shift, coming from the least likely of experiences, but it's hopeful. I can choose to nurture this into a healthy flame and try and steer it away from the madwoman in the attic territory, or just let it go because it would be nice to see the fire before the house burns down. This could mean more shockingly revealing blog posts that are basically romanticised graphic self portraits of wrist slitting. This could be embarrassing for everyone around me. I will try to use pseudonyms wherever possible, (past pseudonyms have included G, Sandwich boy, and Damian Assface. THIS COULD BE YOU!!) but basically anything that you have said, related, showed, or done to me is fair game. I will attempt to be as raw as my dwindling work ethic allows. This is merely a warning, I am giving everyone a week to front up and submit censorship applications. That being said, I change my mind so freaking much that by this time tomorrow I could be off this idea entirely. My Fuck-It Manifesto never took off, but this is an extension. Feel free to express your opinions below, whether on the facebook copy or the original blog.

theme music of this post: The Past Is A Grotesque Animal - Of Montreal

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Brooklyn Heights Sighs

That's the weather right now. I'm meant to be going to open up a new Bank account today. But no. There's no way I'm stepping outside this room today.

Time for a New York Update!

I have been here a week now. After a hellish plane ride (where the kid behind me proceeded to kick my chair for the entirety of the 20-something hour plane ride (THROUGH transit stops) I landed in the land of bagels and fake bacon.

There's not a hell of a lot to blog about yet. It's way too cold out to take photos of anything without freezing my little fingers off. This also means I cannot smoke unless I let a cigarette hang out the side of my mouth, Jimmy Dean style, which would be fitting of all the method training I am getting beat over the head with.

I stopped squealing over snow flurries after about 5 minutes of walking through it and feeling my face frost over.

The first week was eventful only in that my roommate came and left. I met her during the half hour she packed up her things and went home. The toilet was clogged beyond belief. I had two remotes in the tv cabinet, either of which were paired to the tv, dvd, or cable box and I just needed a lot of random knickknacks to get everything settled and habitable.

All exploring of the city has been postponed until the sub freezing weather has passed. So as of yet, no museums, no films, no plays, nothing remotely sociable. It took me until two days ago to buy a kettle, and since then my blood has been running tea. It provides a constant injection of something hot to keep my blood circulating.

In fact, my toes are cold right now. So I'm going to go dip them in my doona and watch crap on tv until I fall asleep again. I've been awake since 5 am, I don't know what's wrong with my head. I haven't forgotten my obligation to keep a running commentary on my travels, I have been writing (the pen and 'skine kind) down random thoughts and I will transpose the publishable elements on here, on a day when my head doesn't feel like sleet and my feet don't want to drop off.

So this is just to say that yes, I will blog more, and with eye candy as well, and bubbly anecdotes. Give me some time, until I feel better about all of this, this being away from everyone, this being at an awkward time zone so I can't even just pick up the phone and talk it over with someone, this sick panicky alone feeling. Or at least until the weather turns.

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more answers than you asked for

I think my body is preemptively adjusting to New York time. That's the only explanation I can come up with for staying awake until 5:30am despite the two sleeping pills I took. And that explains why at 4pm, an hour until I have to get my lazy ass to work, with piles of parcels I have to ship back home to Melbourne before I'm booting off, I finally feel awake.

At some point during this post, I need to slap some makeup on my face and drag my tired feet to tear tickets for four hours. At least I don't have to do anything too serious or for too long. My last two paychecks have indicated to me that I have spent far too much time slogging it for Palace, and that I can afford to get a few full versions of the free apps on my iPhone now.

I can judiciously say that Fieldrunners (aka Desktop Tower Defense with better graphics and on your iphone), is worse than crack. It's a cheap one off payment, it's on you always, and it sucks the (battery) life out of you. Now that I've had time to absorb, I don't think getting the iPhone was the best cure for my media addiction. But now I can do a Sydney Morning Herald quick crossword puzzle 90% of the way through now! I'm only missing the technical stuff (21 down, a large motorboat starting with L - Launch. Who knew?!). With a little more practice, I could graduate to the NYT Monday puzzles by the time I get there.

***
interval - slap and slog time
***

My 4 hour shift got cut to 3 1/2 because it was so quiet, and half of those hours was spent waiting at Don Don's for my manager's food. Fun times.

It's high time I started shipping my ever expanding wealth of stuff home. Somehow I have with me 15 books, 10 dvd's, four cosmetics bags filled to the brim with makeup products, and two trunk loads of clothes and shoes. All in a 3 x 5 metre space, that I was only going to stay for two months in. Granted six of the books are plays and acting related. But did I seriously think I would need 9 recreational volumes of reading material? (That's on top of the magazines, by the way) I can remember exactly what I was thinking. "What if I need some lighter comedic reads? (When You Are Engulfed in Flames - David Sedaris) What if I wanted a high concept epic that was written by someone who still knows how to use language? (Kavalier-Clay, Michael Chabon) What if I wanted some smut? (Delta of Venus - Nin) A modern classic that I can depend on? (Lolita) Some linguistic porn? (Usage & Abusage - Partridge, seriously, have you ever poured through a language manual? I love the bits when he gets condescending, it's delicious.) etc.

Madness. And clearly a sign of things to come as I'm getting to the age of mobility and moving houses, states, and countries. How on earth am I going to go about moving my life with a 25kg limit? I'll have to get friendly with the postal service workers I suppose.

iPhone photo sharing time!!

As an appendix to my last post, I found this ghastly thing on the back of a bus as it was speeding away from me. Luckily I haven't seen it again, so therefore I haven't had to kill anybody.



If you can't read it, it says "Cancer, cancer go away. Don't come race another day." It doesn't make sense, the rhythmic structure is forced, and it's obnoxious. Clearly this is a campaign that does not work because not only do I not understand what they're advertising, my previously intact natural sympathy for anyone affected by cancer is being tested.

Not to be outdone by cancer patients however, we have this shocker.



Let's be clear here. I'm 100% behind the message, I'm all for punk disabled teens with 'tude. But if you need to use fruity capitalisation in your main tag line of the campaign, you need to step away from the myspace, and act your age. It gets to a point when it's no longer market research, but teetering on "online predator".



Now I know why I'm growing my hair to ridiculous lengths. I want to be this creature. She was walking briskly in front of me and the damn lack of auto zoom on the iPhone means this was the best I could come up with. I've been told she often models for the art college nearby. It was like walking behind an elf around Darlinghurst.


Now I need to go crush up 3-5 melatonin tablets and see if it works any better than that Unisom Sleep stuff I took yesterday. I basically need something to replicate what the sun and the heat does to me around 4pm in the afternoon. Seriously, poor Heath, I feel his pain. The world thinks he was partying too hard and having deviant sex, but the damn boy just needed some sleep.




Type rest of the post here

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in transition

That was sticking out of the middle of Taylor Square. A whole row of them. A bit rude I thought. I had to walk down that patch of Bourke St so often it felt like the very ground that I was walking on, Sydney, as a city was just pissing on me. Every time.

You wanna know what else is rude?



That was on Bourke St as well. The good part, the part with all the terrace houses that I gaze into longingly. The one where George the cat hangs out. I named him George. Although I'm 80% sure she's a girl.



I've pet her twice now, we're pretty tight.

So a week in Sydney. It's not terrible. Could definitely be worse. I could have said yes to paying $210 a week to stay in a cramped dilapidated twin share room in supposedly Darlinghurst but actually a block away from Kings Cross. The hunt is still on, although I have a good feeling about this place tomorrow. 5 minutes from work, 2 seconds from the bus stop that's 15 minutes from class. I won't even care if it's not as clean as the photos suggest, if it's livable, I'm moving in.

Apart from walking everywhere trying to find a room, I really haven't achieved much else. I've confirmed that stainless steel pots are absolutely useless if it doesn't have a non-stick surface. And I've found a half decent cup of coffee, a kiwi girl at this cute little cafe/fancy 2nd hand book shop. (I gave her my number, after declaring to the entire room that I need a place to stay). Found out that I DO love most Coles house brand products with the exception of their flavoured tuna. And watched every media file on my computer 5 times over, most of which I'd already seen multiple times. Read very little, written nothing. I'm thinking once I get a desk and chair situation happening I can be a lot more productive.

I do my first shift at Palace Verona tomorrow, very excitement, they have a huge bar with three split sides of tickets/coffee/drinks that actually makes a lot of sense. Plus I've felt bad about going to scam tickets before actually doing a shift so finally getting to see movies again would be good.

I'm waiting for In Bruges to finish download so I'll have something new to watch tonight. continuous repeats of Studio 60, seasons 2,3 and 4 of the American Office, and Clarissa Explains It All is so unhealthy. It might sound like a lot but I have a highly media saturated mind, it needs a constant buzz to keep me from thinking about anything that needs some real doing.

And I miss my boys. They had their first birthday three days before I left, so they are no longer kittens.



My bed feels so empty. Charlie is not slightly elevated, he's sleeping on my legs. While Miles is sleeping against them, successfully blockading me in my sleeping position all night.

I should probably venture into the CBD at some stage, if only to go to the Apple store. I'll do a macgasm post for you all about it one day. I wonder if there will be little old Indian ladies buying their plane tickets on the iMac displays



And don't even get me started on the stupidity of that poster, I had to stare at it for 10 minutes while waiting for my bus, wanting to punch both Jack and Jill's heads in every second.

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Neon Bible

an hour until i have to get to work. today has been all around pretty shit. i AM benjamin law. fated to be married to the public transport system. i really should've gotten more sleep last night.

but outside of today things have been going well. the moronic cutting of my fringe times 4 which caused the epic (romeo in the desert) proportions of yelling "NOOOOOOooo" actually turned out pretty good. in that i don't look like a complete fool, and i can still pin it up if i wanted. the monologues are coming together nicely. finally have them down. i think. sort of. yes.

emmy bemmy's 21st was over the weekend, where i donned the pink wig which kept threatening to fall off. i was lacking a stocking. and hair nets are....well, hair nets. never go there people. was slightly worried about people guessing that i was natalie portman (aka alice the stripper) from closer than what i actually went as. miss thang from lost in translation, in memory of one of the best nights of summer '04. from one rockin party where no one was themselves to another rockin party where it got positively messy with a marathon gay three way in the kitchen. plans were laid out for the fake copelen.

This time next year, Tregsie, Carilious and I, no matter where we are in the world WILL be living together in some rockin house where the furnishings shall be tastefully arranged milk crates, and we would be living off sueballs' maccas VIP card. it shall be Copelen "The Bungalow". and we will work all year to make it happen. it's in writing people! now hustle!

ok i need get get a move on soon. but everyone go here

oh oh and



i know you all love Wes and Jason. the interview's in several clips that just play one after another so just let the goodness roll in people...

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french dog blues

haven't really been in a blogging mood lately. first things first, if you're on facebook, go to the original blog post. it'll make your life that much richer.

so a lot has happened. china and back.


a lot of food, mahjong, bowing and loud percussive noise took place. i was plonked head-first into the province of women, where the thinness and fatness of various relatives could remain the hot topic for up to 4 hours at a time. the days were punctuated by food, the food punctuated by meeting relatives who don't remember me, who i don't remember, and don't really care all that much about my grandfather either.

a certain relative pranced around smiley and giddy with my uncle's camera taking pictures of everything like it was a big party, all i wanted to do was shake her up, slap the camera out of her hands, and scream. all these crazy rituals, who are we doing them for?

it felt horrible leaving my grandmother alone in that big house, with no one around save a few security guards, i was thankful for the long silent drive up to putuo mountain. the rest of the trip was just more food, i never thought i'd get so sick of eating, but i am.

and now i'm back. i had all these movie reviews drafted, maybe i'll finish them one day and put them up. who knows.

there will be fun times ahead though. the mexico trip planning is happening in full swing. tickets have been paid in full, including my extension in the states for about a month. if any of you would happen to be state side dec 5th - jan 6th, give me a holla. i have no idea where i'm going to be other than new years in new york (with jazz and crew) and somehow ending up in LAX for my flight back would be good.

oh and look, it's my birthday soon. i had no idea how soon until today, i honestly thought it was a few weeks away. 22. i don't really feel anything for it, which is why, for the fourth year running, i'm not doing anything for it. this time last year, i was getting excited to see young and restless for the first time. this time last year, i was buying my first penguin red. this time last year, i was just getting to know deano and mr. daphne. you know what? i'm calling it a pretty good year. the bonsai's still alive, one year and counting.

what else do you people care about reading? probably not much. the new issue of McSweeney's is apparently flying to my doorstep some time soon, i'm pretty effing excited, the believer has been bundles of joy and wholphin was pretty damn great.

my man on the inside. that's dean and his bose-ness, hooked me up with a new plasma. plus trimmings, he came around with his manpower buddy oyoy to fix it up nice, and boy is it nice. once we have all the rest of the shit sorted i'm having a movie night. it should be mexico/cuba themed, starting with the motorcycle diaries. or we should just go ahead and do what i have in my mind and let it just be an all out gael garcia bernal night. boy's don't fret, we could put on bad education, it'll be something for everybody. and i will celebrate it by buying the science of sleep. (is it my fault he's got perfect bone structure?)

oh before i flew off to china i went to see the shins.



am i weird for wanting james mercer to be a creepy uncle who drinks too much at family functions and starts hitting on everyone? well i think he's brilliant anyway, and i love that australia is their second single from wincing, and that the title has nothing to do with the song, and that the video has nothing to do with either the title or the song. i know i've linked this already, but seriously, go watch their take-away show. migod. go. now. open up a new tab, the blog'll still be here.

***

now wasn't your day made better by that?

oh and if you're wondering why this post is called french dog blues, it's because babyshambles has a new video. and i really like it. and i don't care how sick people think i am, i love pete doherty. he's like a sick little puppy dog. and wickedly funny when sober. all ironic and drowsy.

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hold your breath

***

I've just realised I haven't really posed a recap of my trip have i? well here it is, hong kong in camera phone pictures...

You line it up to your face, and tweeze your eyebrows according to the line. I love sasa. there was also these cheek templates, you can choose to have a round circle, an oval, or a harsher dash across your cheek, space it from your nose, and apply blush.



there were two shelves full of different kinds of these. double sided sticky tape you place on your eyelid to create a crease, what asians call "double eyelids" as opposed to their chinky "mongolian eyes"



As I was taking this, 5 of them were still smoking



I love instant noodles, and the leaps and bounds asian instant noodles have taken since the last time i was in the warm cradle of preservative broth. now they come with eggs, in sealed foil. and not just any old boiled egg, the old home styled tea eggs i used to have as a kid. the yoke was a bit flaky.



I hate drinking, everyone knows that. well, a few things happened and my face met the pavement of Lan Kwai Fong. moet was involved. this ugly bruise was what resulted



I love fast food. this was fast food asian style. i learned to keep away from the rice burgers this time (teriyaki beef surrounded by two rice buns, sounds good, don't taste it) this was just a simple beef dish. cheap meet, drenched in sauce. I just really liked their fruit punch, they had this at maccas too. diced tinned fruit in tutti fruitti soda punch.

and that was it. that was all the photos i took while abroad. all on my phone. a few lucky peeps wrangled some souvenirs out of me, lucky bastards, i didn't even buy anything for myself. cept for the perfume. speaking of which, my perfume, the one i've been using the last three, four years, has been discontinued. fuck i want to be famous just so i can kick giorgio armani in the arse and get him to make them again. i don't smell like myself anymore, it's disorienting.

***

only other thing i got out of the trip was the realisation that, for no apparent reason, i've become the fat girl. i've never been the fat girl in my life. actually when i was younger i was always a little too thin, and then something happened, puberty probably, and i filled out a little more, i felt good about the filling out, i got bigger boobs out of it. modest yes, but bigger. i remembered joking around with friends that when i see someone overweight, i wonder if there is a moment when they look in the mirror and start to realise that, maybe they've over extended themselves a little? the tipping point where they think, shit, i've really gained a few there? and now i'm looking in the mirror, and thinking, is this the moment? fuck, how did it happen? and before you start writing in on how i'm not and i look "womanly" and blah blah, it's ok, i'm happy with my body, i really am. but i realise i have gained a bit since this time last year, and that was a few inches more on six months before that. i was wearing this pair of pants that i loved back in year 12, they used to hang on me, and tonight through the two films that i saw i was squirming around because they were so tight, and sitting a little high. i always thought i really packed it on during my late night "study sessions" back then. anyway, useless waffle. point is, i want to get healthier. start running, join a yoga class that sort of thing. i won't starve myself, god knows i can't. so don't worry.

***

MIFF started. that's pretty awesome, already seen three films out of it. Sicko for the opening last night, Breath (Kim Ki Duk) and Lagerfeld Confidential tonight.

I've never liked michael moore, but he does have a certain sense of humour about him. sicko hit a few of the right spots, and hopefully it draws some attention to this blindingly obvious problem. I kept hoping he would come down and evaluate the australian health care system, just to prove that we're not going in the way of the americans, but he didn't, and i'm still not so sure, we certainly don't get free treatment for everything.

The Kim Ki Duk was his usual study of human interactions and twisted mentalities. That's not to say it was anything short of brilliant. I've never disliked a movie made by that man, and the line in front of RMIT Capitol attests to his popularity here. granted i haven't actually seen any of his commercial work for the mainstream Korean media, but i'd say he's keeping happy enough with his art now to not bother with them anymore. There's another one of his films in the festival this year which i'm seeing tuesday night, can't wait.

The Karl Lagerfeld doco was...well...the subject matter was very interesting, otherwise it was pretty dull. it was pretty badly made, a lot of cliched shots of the roaring sea, later justified by young karl running in and out of the waves (at least i hope it was karl, otherwise that would've been just 5 minutes of pure crap). it reminds me of what nick hornby writes of biographies in the Polysyllabic Spree, cut the crap. who cares if someone who later became a genius at one stage of his childhood did something really mundane? or something to that effect. if you have little material to work with (which i suspect this filmmaker did, a lot shots from a distance, fillers, very little actual interview) don't fill it with crap. a shorter film doesn't make it less worthwhile. lagerfeld himself was a riot. he has a giant library that requires those wheel things to open up the shelves, books fill his bedroom, as do silver rings which he wears in abundance on his finger ("he used to be able to pat you, now it hurts"). he has a million ipods, and talks candidly about practicing homosexuality since he was 13. when he came home one night after being assaulted by a man and a woman, one can assume sexually, around the age of 11 or 12, his mother said to him "look at yourself, it's your own fault". there's a sign that hangs in the bathrooms, in the iconic Chanel white on black printed in French "Pissing everywhere isn't very Chanel". i wish a better filmmaker had made it.

aside from all that, well, a lot of things happened. among which my relationship status on my facebook. i know it's only a matter of time, but for now it just damned unbearable. i really am the shittest person i know.

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HK mania

Oh, it's humid alright. you don't even have time to sweat, the moment you step out a layer of reverse condensation develops on your skin. So far, i've done pretty much nothing. slept a lot, kept checking emails. I don't get to meet anybody til at least Monday, then I have a week to squeeze in as many meetings as i can.

the plane ride over here was largely uneventful, from melbourne to sing i sat next to this american medical research presenter who's on his way to the epilepsy convention. His breath stank a little, though he was nice enough, and nice enough to put his headphones on and didn't talk to me from take off onwards. happily enjoyed a whole bunch of embarrassing movies guilt free on the plane. Blades of Glory, Disturbia, Priceless, and half of Night at the Museum because I fell asleep half way through. i really didn't miss out on much.

the flight from singapore to hong kong was longer than i expected, there was a girl sitting with me, the seat between us was empty. but the girl, was the dullest little creature. she did. not. move. at all. didn't put her headphones on, didn't read anything, didn't look at anything. just sat there and stared. it was so strange, like tim burton's staring girl, i waiting for her to take her eyeballs out for the "well deserved rest".

yeah you guys don't care. anyway, i got here in one piece. a man on the plane with me who stood inline behind us for the check in saw me get off and gave me his card and told me to call him if i need anything, which i thought was nice of him, he didn't seem like the predatory type, although i doubt i'd call him.

i went out for walks today. just around the area. it's seedy and busy, with all this upmarket designer goods mixed with the dingiest riff raff stores. i needed to buy some adapters so i can charge my phone and stuff, but couldn't find them anywhere. so i wander into this building, that looks kind of dirty and the sort of place you can find cheap gadgety things, and it was like i stumbled into little india, if little india was run by a sleazy uncle who happened to be a wise guy. you know, not a connected guy, a wise guy. anyway, point of the story is, it was scary. i was right though, i found power adapters, but i didn't want to stop for long enough to buy it, i just kept walking and avoided eye contact. i come back and look in my guide book and the description actually did contain the words seedy and sleazy and worth a look just for kicks. well i'm glad i can tick THAT off my itinerary. anyway it was too hot to walk around too much, and all the streets i took happened to lead me right back here, so i came back.

my mum's friend's sister called me and his son asked me if i wanted to go out tonight. with my overseas can-do attitude i said "erm....ok?" then he said "ok i'll call you before we go clubbing" and hung up. so apparently i'm going clubbing, with a bunch of boys i've never met, in a pressure cooker. I should bail. i need my sleep if i want to make the 10:30 cut-off for my breakfast buffet. waffles tomorrow?

i can't be bothered blogging in any coherent manner, outside is too hot and my room is too cold, i've brought no jumpers with me and nothing that covers up past my knees. any words of support can be sent to me on my temporary 3 phone number, or facebook. daphne, get facebook, because i can get on it through my phone. myspace spazzes it out.

i'm a little freaked. and not knowing what the hell i'm doing is a little scary. and the fact that i don't smell like myself (they didn't have my perfume at the duty free store at the air port) worries me a little too. i bought amarni code because i needed a smell, and my plane was having a final boarding call, and now i smell like an overpriced version of burberry brit, a bit like an expensive teddy bear. where are all the fun daggy people?

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utilities

when you break someone's heart you always shatter into pieces yourself. today was spent in a delirious daze of sobbing uncontrollably, whimpering in bed, manically dialing and hanging up, and finally letting the call get through and letting everything out in one outburst that became a mild panic attack where my body contorted and i couldn't breath. i can't begin to image what he is going through.

you do tend to think about the beginning, don't you? you can't help it, and you start pin pointing all the precise moments you screwed it up. some screw ups bigger than others. some are unforgivable and causes the kind of regret that ties up your intestines and makes you want to rip out your insides. and knowing that there is absolutely nothing i can do, but beg and cry.

i had my rally team of cheer me ups. high fidelity, mean girls, by the time i got to clueless i feel relatively ok again, to get myself to the point where i can come to accept the consequences, and accept my lot.

it changes you. each time it changes you a little. a little bit more resilient, or patient maybe? i owe so much to him, his energy, the constant wanting of bettering himself. but personality changes too, tastes. carnivale, all the noir we watched the books we shared. he fueled my unhealthy appetite of moleskines with noodler's ink, penguin reds, buying paperbacks, trolling JB, ikea, borders.. we did so many nothings that were all just perfect. i was collecting pieces of a new life, things that make me feel like i'm finally living for myself, but with him, and i'm pretty sure he was too.

there's a soreness of wanting the past to restore itself, and knowing that even if we were still together, nothing would be the same. feel like the biggest fool. i just want to be a part of his life.

i need a break

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quickie before work

i just wanted to make a not that i managed to waste 2 hours on THIS today without realising and was almost late to work.

i am TEH suck

but try it. it's all kinds of addictive.

oh and sorry about the down time. i was trying to port this to riceingenue.com my newly aquired domain name, but it's taking a while...

you can go to ricep0d.com for my tumblelog. there's nothing on it yet. but you just wait...

i also bought magnetsanswerall.com for cary. anytime you wanna use it for anything boy, just shout

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real life in 3D

ok already!

it's not about having a life, it's about actually doing things with my time and not being tied to the computer. so here it is, liquid crystal pixel ink to my virtual paper. a post, aghast!

failed my p's today.

like seriously. i suck. not only did i wait til a good half a year after i turn 21 to even attempt to put all those motoring skills to the test i had to suck at it. granted the most suckiest of reason to fail EVAH. it was all fine, we were cruising along, and i was doing GREAT. and on the way back, about 2 minutes from the end destination, i was just sitting there in the driver's seat thinking to myself... "is this a 50 zone? or a 60? it looks big enough and non-residential enough to be a 60, and they're all 60s around here...hmm...i'm going too slow then..." and grrrrr...up the speedometer

*tap tap* on the shoulder
"erm...can you pull over please."

SERIOUSLY! I FAILED FOR SPEEDING! OF ALL THINGS. THIS MAKES ME ANGRY. ALL CAPS KINDA ANGRY.

enough of that. Australia's Next Top Model was very cleansing. especially since i wasn't really watching and only looked at the pictures at the end. i can't believe the entire cast of Will and Grace are on Inside the Actor's Studio. Megan's voice is so normal, it's insanely disconcerting.

horrifying dream last night. and i was so aware that i was in a dream and was desperately trying to wake myself up. it was bizarre. i tried to run and it was kind of like running in water, so then i started banging my hand against my head and nothing. (i did acknowledge for a moment how amazing it was that i actually felt nothing and that all those cliches about pinching yourself were oddly true). it took a little while but i eventually did scare myself awake. that was a surreal moment, i couldn't be sure if i was awake awake and couldn't shake the dream off me. i can still remember everything so vividly.

***
RETURN OF THE FIVES
***

5 things ticking me off RIGHT now

1. william blake
2. the internet still not working on my new shiny new phone
3. i'm always either too cold or too warm. why can't i be warm blooded?
4. there's no chips in the house
5. i should be asleep by now

my eyelashes were fierce today. i want to try the new diorshow blackout mascara.

i want to read more. and absorb things without worrying about assessment. i want this whole uni thing to be over.

i need some sleep.

the science of sleep was awesome. if anyone is on my list (you know, the list of celebrities you can fuck without it being counted as cheating) gael garcia bernal is on it.

i want to be elsewhere...


***
list of celebrities i'd like to fuck without it being counted as cheating
***

1. the depp man
2. miss scarlett + mr. hartnett
3. gael garcia bernal
4. ryan mickey mouse club gosling
5. jonathan rhys meyers. just because he seems like he'd be really really good in bed in that asshole kind of way. you know?
supps:
milla, would not say no to her.
that guy who was not benji but was the runner up in 'so you think you can dance 2'.
natalie portman, although i'd feel bad after.

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plum sauce pork ribs

work at palace has been really good. they've been giving me a lot of shifts, which could either mean that they are really really under staffed, or that i haven't screwed up too big yet! either way, yay for me! the world is wonderfully small though. i won't bore you with the deets but needless to say, many people turns out to be friends of friends and i went to school with two of the girls...blah blah blah prawn crackers!

seriously prawn crackers, we got them for free with out take away order today. Red Hot Wok on Toorak Rd, South Yarra; tasty food, tiny servings, but free prawn crackers! seriously they do pizza hut like deals with soft drinks it's kinda strange. and all the waiters are uniformly unfriendly. no one smiles in that place. ever. it kinda scares me.

since i'm rambling. i really want to do this. i'm in need of more hard drive space, and i think i have a large skine that's not getting enough use i could cut up...

along with my stupid sickness, and general lack of energy, my room has accumulated a collection of drink bottles, cups, scrunched up tissues, clothes, laundry, uni stuff, and a corner where the boy always dumps his stuff. just today he looked at me lying on my bed and said
"what's that corn doing on your bed head?"
i think i need to do a massive clean out soon. and i can start bringing my books home. i've been missing my babies.

i don't think very much anymore. which is why this blog is becoming rambling updates and not much else. i don't know how to think anymore. if anyone has any ideas for a ready made essay on blake shoot it my way. it's making my head hurt. and it really really hurts.

oh oh yes the boy turned 21. he looks the same, acts the same, threw up once, cut his finger and crawled into my arms, and quit a job. well on his way i daresay. photos of all shenanigans on my flickr. for all you losers who missed it, there was a lot of drinking, choofing, and sneaking hungry jacks into the pub (you're welcome rhys). word has it, a good time was had by all. oh by the way, the photo of mel's boobs on the first page of my flickr is getting so many hits it's ridiculous. like 60 as opposed to the 2 or 3 of all the rest.

actually he is at amber's 21st right now, or should be on his way here by now. i think i hear him!

*hitting publish*

20 minutes later...

no no, he's not coming for a good while yet. he says next half hour. but what's the bet? 2am? any takers? i'm saying at least 2, maybe 2:30. maybe i'll lie in bed and watch streetcar and revel in the fact that at least he's nothing like stanley. and how hot brando was, and vivian leigh, nutter as she was.

gling glo, can't help loving that man of mine

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strawberry cookie shakes

whenever i have essays due, i become such a geek. i start signing up to things and cleaning up my bookmarks toolbar, and because a productivity guru.

i got Jaiku working today. which pulls things from my twitter, both things i got working with my mobile today. so you can all stalk me, i'll be sure to twitter exactly what i'm doing all the time, and people on jaiku can see it too, jaiku is also pulling my blog posts from here, as well as my flickr photos. my blog posts are also being pulled into my facebook. i also signed up for tumblr for a tumblelog. which i can upload videos i find on to and don't have to burden this blog with crap like that which according to darren is just useless crap anyway. i'll link you once i post something. but since it's a steram of consciousness type low key blog i feel it's probably going to be used a hell of a lot pretty soon. you can check out merlin mann's and also leo laporte's to get an idea of what it'll be like.

Other than that. big news shot through the cultural world today. Kurt Vonnegut died. which is all kinds of sad. i barely got through slaughterhouse 5 (even though it's the shortest book ever) but it was mainly because it was making me uncomfortable. just slightly unsettling. each time a "so it goes" pops up i'd get shivers up my spine. RIP kurt. so it goes

I got a job yesterday. Palace cinemas called me tuesday when i was in the middle of what would probably be the busiest line at a post office counter ever, i was unfortunately at the wrong end of the counter. but i called them back and they told me they were impressed by my resume. but i mean how could they not? they couldn't ask for more experience, or any closer. only problem was that i threw out my last pair of contacts before checking if i had any left and so after a mad scramble looking for the non-existent spare lenses (searching becomes an endlessly more tedious task while half blind) i tried to make myself as presentable as i could imagine without really looking in a mirror and went to an interview staring at the two little black dots on a face which i hoped were his eyes. but the interview was dead easy, i think they gave me the job before i even went in to meet them. they should be giving me a call soon for a first shift, he said probably this weekend just to get things started. i'm so excited. palace como has to be probably the best cinemas ever. and free tickets? say whoa?

i'm pretty screwed for these essays though. the blake class shits me so much that i don't even like to open up the book. there's a lot of work to be done the next few days. i'll try not to twitter or jaiku or tumlelog too much.

speaking of which, i should probably dive right in again.

oh wait! i went and saw The Lives of Others today and it was aaaawesome. incredible story, and the characters are all so great. i WILL definitely review it properly. this one at least. (oh wow....i need to review like 14 movies...)

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independence day

so officially, as of 14 March 2007 at 12:00p.m. your's truly left home. not unprovoked i might add. an imac G5 is now without a screen and many accumulated little pieces of junk has been scattered across all sections of the bedroom. photos have been torn up, broken glass everywhere. behold gladies, the wrath of Mrs. Qin

so until further notice, i shall be situated at residence of the boy. thus turning lazy alice, back into commuter alice. it is however, still cramped corners in house gubbins, so my horde of adoring fans, please be my eyes and ears and be on the lookout for a room in/near the city/uni. CONSTANT VIGILANCE!

i'm looking out this window and i see...hope? a future? fair weather?

just some birds and some washing on the laundry line.

i'll get there though. don't you worry yourself about me.

i was camera whoring the night before it happened. so unwittingly, my "girl with sleeping boy story" has become "the last night" in my room.

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Guilty Pleasures

I've been a terrible webstress. i'm terribly sorry. there ain't much to excuse my behaviour. I haven't been particularly busy, or anything less than lazy.

Most of you know by now that in between posts i got my self some kind of inked



and in anticipation of any faq's yes the meaning is three-fold
1. it's my initials. for at least the two outer corners of my name
2. i wanted the queen of hearts for alice in wonderland. "Off with'is 'ead!"
3. it also makes 21 in blackjack (now i know some of you scoff at this as a reason to get a tatt, but think, i'll always remember when i got it right?)

I saw two burlesque shows, spent valentines with a group of fun loving people, went to junkyard cinemas a few times, went to rooftop once, saw a whole bunch of movies that i still need to review properly.

oh and young carilious turned 22



rio (john) who shares the same birthday came to celebrate too. it was a dirty night at a nasty asian rnb club as promised, and carilious went home wasted as promised.

***

Uni started. and for some reason (my lack of communication with admin) i got stuck doing only two subjects this semester. which means i lose my concession, and my will to live. drats. but ho! this means a whole semester of nothing but Blake and C18th crime literature! i can feel the blood rushing back into my head!

and good news my friends. you all know my own personal hero (read: demi-god) felicity colman? well out of the goodness of her heart, some sexual favours and probably a lot of wanting to keep her subjects open, she's decided to award me an h2a for a subject i didn't write a final essay on. she is now elevated to the level of appreciation i reserve for porn stars only in my heart.

speaking of porn stars. ladies and gentleman, is maria ozawa not the most beautiful specimen of the dirty kind alive?
(this woman does hardcore!)

google her yourself you pervert (start by clicking the picture)

i hope you are all well. comment a little so i know you still love me and forgive me for all my misgivings. and i'll check back again. soon. for reals.

a make-up list
5 things alice is loving at the moment

1. the cookies and cream ice-cream in her freezer
2. old goriot
3. NOT the class that's making her read old goriot. lit girls are idiots
4. the boy's guitar lying next to this couch reminding her that he was trying to play classical pieces she used to play on the piano
5. finally getting a blog post out

***

and since this is all on guilty pleasures. here's a secret guilty pleasure of mine. joss stone. i don't know what it is about her. her pretentious bare foot performances, her all american soul mama voice cracked into pieces that only 20 years of cigarette smoking knows how, the fact that she's a 19 years old white girl from kent notwithstanding, i don't get it either. but here she is in funky technicolour and legs that come up to ^here.



i was debating over whether to post this video (i know none of you would enjoy) or a bruce willis performance involving a white trench coat, some glasses that needs explaining, a rock band and a harmonica. but that might be a little too scary to jump back into the saddle with.

until next time.
aq out

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that girl and the drum n bass

i'm sorry about all the delays. i'm just feeling lazy all over. i have lazy in my skin. i have photos to upload but my internet is being an abusive lover giving and taking at its own goddamn random will.

and given the choice to either snuggle up to sugar cubes and watch twin peaks or writing the (now count them!) FIVE movie reviews i have lined up of course i'm going to choose the option with less requirement of trying to string words together.

so to simplify things. a teaser list

5 movies - 5 words

Pan's Labyrinth ***1/2 brutal, whimsy, mandrake!!, ugly, charming

The Fountain **1/2 confusing, dull, mayans, pretty, WTF?!

Stranger Than Fiction **** graphicy, quirky, huckabees, awesomeness, rofl

Pursuit of Happyness *** predictable, freshprince, cutekid, uplifting, reassuring

For Your Consideration ***1/2 cosy, awkward, extras, chillaxin', parkerposeyonewomanshow'd!!!


there you go folks. there's going to be a better post soon. i'm sure of it.

and i'm sorry yoyo.

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summer drive

back from the beach. total sightings of beach? oh, a few glimpses here and there. total amount of time spent on the beach? nudda. the closest we got was the safeway across the street. it was beautiful though. a lot of lying around watching movies we've already seen even though both of us took down a whole bunch of movies we really should be watching. he played a lot of golf, i stayed in and finished reading Perfume. which by the way, the ending blew my mind in more ways i care to share.

he took me driving, it was interesting. i think i like the rolling much better than the accelerate, and the road is preferable to the bushes surrounding the road, i must take a note of that for future references.

i didn't take any pictures for a change, it was much more relaxed than that this time, and we were far too naked for far too much of the time for an actual record of our sojourn.

for now a record of movies that we watched would do: (in place of this week's list)

The Man Who Wasn't There
Fast Times At Ridgemont High
Pretty In Pink
Rebecca
Citizen Kane
(half of) Brazil
The Royal Tenenbaums

I've decided to fire up my movies reviews again. once i start going to the cinema that is. i'll try to write a review of every movie i watched in a cinema in 07 as well as going back and reviewing a few old favourites i mention on this thing. i'm sure five movies in i'll give up but i can only dream.

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NYE06

just a quick update everyone. HAPPY NEW YEAR! i have a feeling this is going to be a decent year. what did i do? WELL... there was of course, cokeboy's smashing party (the Dean-A-Palooza) which included some bbq action, a little backyard sports and a game of pin the glasses on the dean. (my only regret is that i forgot to take a photo). I've uploaded a selection of photos on flickr. go take a lookie here.



didn't really take a lot of photos. there was these great shots of dean by the bbq that if you flicked them back and forth it looked like he's dancing, but since i don't have image ready on this computer and the boy's sleeping and it's dark here and i really can't be bothered, i didn't make a gif image. however i do believe this following video more than makes up for it.



in between we went to one of the boy's friend's pool party where there were a lot of half naked boys and sticky floors and bad music. i got scared fast and pulled a totally plastered darren back up to dean's place where we were treated to the 80s movie version of Transformers, Mario Bros. the TV series and a live action HEMAN!

much fun was had (all except for some half hour when the boy went missing, actually he went missing twice and we had to send out a search party. drunk darren likes to explore)

I wrote down some resolutions, but since i'm sitting in a corner of my bedroom trying not to disturb sleeping darren i won't go looking for them. basically involved getting a job, getting my license, and getting a direction.

Happy New Year everyone, I hope you're all ready for 07, it's going to be huuuuuge!

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